when i die, i want my ashes to be put in the most beautiful old tin anyone can find. it has to have at least some gold on it, and preferably roses. maybe it won't be one tin, but a series of them, so several people can have pieces. then i want those ashes to go somewhere, i don't particularly care where, they'll just float around to somewhere dirty and ugly again, so it doesnt matter. then people will take those tins home, and wash them out. scrub them really hard, because i don't want any of my musty self hanging out in them. and then those tins will become cookie tins, and people will eat cookies out of them and think of me.
i'm dressed up for my perzine workshop tonight (personal zines for the pensive!) ready to read rollerderby outloud, wonder at the greatness of lisa carver & dame darcy. & happy birthday molly. (if you read this at all, leave me your address, i have something for you)
so so so sick. a sickness that has not gone away for days, a week now maybe. but there was easter, with the rediscovering of the jesus story (the only way to understand is to think of jesus as a political martyr, and judas as a confused man, not being truthful to himself, not quite radical enough. he needed to go through some workshops) but in the meantime all i have been doing is sewing, dreaming crazy dreams and working at zapp. love to all.